Celebrity Watch is an automatically-generated website that presents up-to-date entertainment news from around the world. It demonstrates the application of many pattern analysis methods that allow us to autonomously monitor millions of news articles and hundreds of millions of references to people mentioned in them. We apply statistical methods to merge references into people, track their association to various topics of news, and generate social networks of their co-occurrences in articles. From this sea of data we select the forty most-relevant people and display them on the website, offering users a highly condensed view of the latest in entertainment news. The site updates itself throughout the day and is the final step in a large, fully-autonomous system that monitors online news media.